Excuses to Leave
The first time I remember hearing about a large number of people either leaving America or considering moving to another country was during the Vietnam War. Young men who were draft bait and a small number of others who disagreed with the war policies of Presidents Johnson and Nixon considered the possibility of moving to Canada, Mexico or other countries. Some of them actually did move, although that was a rare thing to do in the 1960’s and 1970’s.
Since that time different people from different countries have crossed borders for political reasons. In America we’re taught as children that our ancestors have come here over the last five centuries for economic reasons. It’s a nice thought, a convenient thing to say, but it’s not entirely true.
Among the early settlers who landed in the New World were countless Jews escaping the rule of the monarchs of Spain and Portugal. Puritans fled England to escape the Church of England for the comparative freedom of New England. Quakers went to Pennsylvania and Catholics to Maryland for the same reason. Historically, economic, religious and political persecution have always been good reasons to emigrate from one country for another.
We can stay in a place when, from our perspective, times are tough. Life, whatever it was like before, appears to be going South. We can look for reasons to stay as easily as we can find reasons to leave.
Similarly, it’s always been true that we can look for all of the wonderful reasons to stay in relationships or we can look for excuses to leave. Life is not stacked against us. We might like to think it is. Especially during the last two months of the year when we feel like we’re on sensory and emotional overload.
We have our regular life to live. Work, family, friends, and our personal time to play. Even in retirement from the eight to five life there are still daily chores that have to be done.
On top of that there are all of the holidays. So many holidays. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, New Year and on and on until we think were ready to drop. There are holiday parties whether we want them or not. Families, blood relatives and those families we find of people along our way who come and go, change and move on, everybody has plans. Who can’t think of excuses to pass on some of the enforced gaiety of the season?
In the business world this was the time of year when we prepared for tax season and a new calendar year with all of the changes that brought with it. Not only did we have to prepare for the company’s change of year, but several departments in every company are involved in employee taxes, bonuses and whatever else comes our way. The only excuse to escape work was for a holiday party, only to have to make up the time later.
What happens when we think about excuses to leave all of these worldly matters off to the side and concentrate on what matters most?
Just because I might want to visit with someone over the holidays, or any days, doesn’t mean it’s always the best idea I’ve ever had. I’m not always sufficiently spiritually pulled together to be with other people. November and December are physically draining months because we have such high expectations of ourselves and our world. If I’m overwhelmed by all there is to do at any given time, it’s my responsibility to myself and my world to pull back.
If I fail to nurture myself, my own soul and mind and spirit, how can I be any good to anyone else? Getting together to visit with friends and family is a nice idea, but if my spiritual and emotional reserves are drying up and I feel exhausted, it’s time to leave the party.
It’s a wonderful gesture from the heart to put together holiday meals regardless of the time of year. I love hearing about the families who make the traditional American Thanksgiving dinner plus special dishes from their ancestors’ homelands. The more we spread out our wings like that, the more American we are. We are also more truly spiritual because we’re making room inside ourselves. We’re enlarging our soul’s capacity to reach out to people we do and do not know.
One more thing.
While we may know of people who want to switch jobs, towns, countries and more we haven’t even mentioned or thought of, some people feel their life’s spiritual work is done and they want to leave. They want to go Home to their Creator. They are not crazy. They are living full, complete lives. But they have also spent their entire lives and what seems like eternities before helping other folks. They’re tired. They want to go Home.
I understand this. I am one of them. Not that I’m actually going anywhere. God isn’t in the mood. We look at the madness going on in our world, at the peoples everywhere who are attempting to pull down and destroy what is good. Some of us have been working to stop this for as long as we have existed.
We’re tired. We feel like we’re being ignored. It appears to us that humans don’t care about themselves. Humans don’t want to put in the time and effort to make this a better world for themselves and each other. We look around and we see massive selfishness and destruction.
If your goal in life is to annihilate yourself, devastate your world, wreak havoc upon life itself, then it is no stretch at all to let you know that you are simply wasting time. Pull yourself together. If you’re going to be here, do something constructive. Do not try to tear down when you can more readily build up.
Do you want to be able to look back and be able to remember this holiday season?
Do something for others that will make this a better place to live.
