Jamie, I love your writing. This memoir, as ever, strikes home. About fifteen years ago, my husband and I went to visit his parents for the first time. As his mother showed me her shrine to him, I looked at him and told him that when we were young I would never have asked him to dance or dated him. He was too beautiful for ordinary guys like me. His shocked mother listened as my husband told me how hard it was to find someone who just wanted to dance or hang out. Nobody would talk to him because he was too pretty. He's still handsome, but now we dance!

I totally get what you say about feeling out of place. Maybe 35 years ago a bi friend in Boston asked if someplace I went to was a gay setting. I told her it was if I was there. What other people think of us becomes less important with age whether they are lgbtq or h.

Live your own life and be happy.